Amie and I were discussing parenting techniques especially as it pertains to our teen-aged Foster son, Azur. I was surprised and a bit put off to learn that she did not share my views on what was acceptable or unacceptable behavior. It actually made me stand back and question myself. Am I becoming irrelevant in regards to today's teens? Am I too harsh?
Remember when poking your friends on Facebook was innocent and carried no intent or purpose? Well that was so last year. There’s now a new Facebook app that allows users to pick which friend they want to ‘poke’ and if said friend agree to their subtle request, ladies and gentlemen, we have a sex match! Mama mia!
Let me weight in on this as you expect me to. When I first heard about this, I thought it was a joke. No way! How could they? Well way. And they not only could, they did. Remember when things were sacred? Not saying that I’ve never had meaningless sex, yes I have. So sue me. Just kidding, don’t sue me. But seriously, an app to set up sexual encounters with your Facebook friends?
I can imagine this conversation between a couple. ”Honey, what are you doing?” ”Oh nothing, just on Facebook.” The wife comes running up. ”Why are you going through your friends’ list? Think I don’t know about that new app called ‘Bang with friends’ that you can hook up with your friends with?” ”Babes, I am just deleting some friends. Cleaning house. I don’t have that app and never will. You are all the woman I need. I love you.” “Honey, I think it’s time we cancel our Facebook accounts.”
Yes, Bang With Friends app is here. A user, from the comfort of his bedroom, can let Jessica know he has harbored sexual thoughts and pent-up lusts over her. Should she decide that she shares his feelings somewhat, they can get together and see if the sparks fly.
Why am I not vehement in my objection to this? Well maybe because nothing like this surprises me anymore. Love, marriage and sex are not what they used to be. Self respect is fast disappearing. It’s appalling to say the least. It’s degrading but I am so desensitized that I can see the humor in it. I am sorry if I say it’s funny but it’s my take, remember? Must I always remind you of that?
Anyways, to each his own. If consulting adults feel like poking their friends, knock yourselves out. It’s happening with or without the app. The app just puts in more in our faces but it’s been happening while we snooze.
Lance Armstrong (Photo credit: goat karma)
I loved Ben Johnson. He was one of my favorite athletes. When news broke that he had taken banned substance, I was more inclined to believe his denials than the claims. Being a part time conspiracy theorist helped too. Then Marion Jones, same thing. Barry Bonds, Hulk Hogan, Manny Pacquiao, Pee Wee Herman, oh wait a minute, how did Pee Wee get on that list? Scratch him. Maybe scratch the Pac Man too, not sure yet. But anyways, these guys sounded so sincere in their denials. ”NO! I DID NOT TAKE ANY STERIODS! I WOULD NEVER DO THAT!” How could I not believe them? Plus I’m a real good judge of people. But these guys are good. Pretty convincing at least to me.
Then came Lance Armstrong. The king of the cycling world. This time I was certain the system was out to get him. He wouldn’t knowingly cheat. Of course he wouldn’t, he had too much to lose. Heck, the guy beat cancer, he knows how to fight the odds without cheating. Plus he had that Livestrong foundation thingy going for him. He won’t sully his name like that. Lance decision to take the punishment rather than fight the inquiry, raised some questions but not enough. I still believed he was innocent.
I was just starting to get over this whole thing when out of the blue, Lance decided he was going to come clean on the Oprah Winfrey Show! What? Come clean? You mean you weren’t truthful? You tricked me? I should have known! Asked by Oprah if he took steroids, he said yes. Blood transfusions? Yes. Growth hormones? Are you stupid? Yes. Oh Lance….
When will they ever learn that they will get caught? Is it worth the risks? Granted, he stands to still make up to $100 000 per gig as a public figure. Just to show up at stuff and looked pretty. Lance, I don’t give a crap about what you did. The roids that is. You stand to lose a lot more than you could have gained. Sucks to be you but if only you were smart enough your name could have been indelibly etched in the annals of history as a great man. Now don’t take this the wrong way but now you might only be remembered as a fraud, a coward, a cheat and a fool. All those tours? Just a big waste of time. Nothing to show for them.
Don’t worry, it’s just my take.
You are perhaps wondering where I’m going with this blog. Well they may sound like a mismatched couple but alcohol and Facebook , has more in common than you think.
I had this Aha! moment the other day while on Facebook. I was checking my news feed and browsing a few status updates. Some of the statuses my friends had led me to wonder, ”Would she say this in person?” or ”This does not sound like him at all. He doesn’t talk like this. Actually he’s never talked like this in all the years that I have known him.” And that is when I made the connection.
Facebook and Twitter to some extent, gives us that imagined protection and bravery to say whatever we want, just like alcohol. All of a sudden, we can talk about our lazy boyfriend or girlfriend and even wax philosophical. Just like with alcohol. We can rant about how bad life is and how our work sucks, also just like alcohol. Hey, and when on Facebook, it’s all about us. We try to be the center of attention. Again, (Let’s all say it together) JUST LIKE ALCOHOL! I mean, some of us don’t need Facebook or alcohol to do all that but for the rest of us, we need a dose of bravery, in liquid or media form.
So, which persona is real? Is Facebook giving us the chance and courage to be and say who we really are or are we playing dress up? If it is the former, maybe I should only communicate with my friends and family via Facebook. This way we could be ‘keep it real’. Or have a nice stiff drink of bravery. I am thinking most would opt for that choice.
And you thought I was going to blog about Facebooking while drunk.
Today is the last of triple date you and I will ever see. Sad eh? Not really. What does it mean? Nothing. Just another date that looks nice and will look even nicer at 12:12pm. A palindrome as it is called.
Now consider 08.08.08. That was four years ago and was the last time I would ever have a birthday in that sequence. Ever! Sad eh? Yeah, I’ll really miss those numbers. Oh, consider this also, my birthday is August 8th, 08.08, multiply them by each other and you get 64 which coincidentally, is my birth year. Freaky!
So as you go about your day, try not to pay too much attention to the fact that it is 12.12.12. It’s hard to ignore as it is on every media and your friends won’t let you forget it. As I blog, an ad on the radio beckons me to come on down and purchase a vehicle as today is a monumental day. Sure, I’ll get right on that. There are also quite a few weddings today. Unusual for a Wednesday but it’s not a usual Wednesday, right? Wrong! Tell that to your boss. The good thing about this though is the husbands would never again forget their anniversary, or would they? So if you can’t escape it the 12.12.12 hype, then have yourself a Happy 12.12.12, enjoy the palindrome.
You know what I’m talking about, right? You hurry to the store to get your hands on an advertised item. Just when you are about to get it off the shelf, a voice goes, “I wouldn’t buy that if I were you.” You look around expecting a customer who wants to duel for the item but no, it’s a sales clerk.
“Say what?” ”I said I wouldn’t buy that if I were you. That’s no good. I had one and it worked for a month.” You are confused. ”But, but…why do you guys carry it then? You are selling something that’s useless?” This is messed up. “Don’t worry, sir. Come let me show you a better product. It might cost you a bit more but it lasts forever.”
Your scenario might be a bit different but the same ending. The conspiratorial sales clerk who just met you but willing to go against his boss to get you the best product.
I took my car to get an oil change the other day, using a coupon that offered a discount on the price of the oil. It didn’t stop the mechanic from trying to upsell me. “This one keeps your engine running smoother and is better for gas mileage.” Yes, of course it was a bit more. It’s usually is a ‘bit more’. ”No, I’ll stick with the one on sale. ”Ok sir, no problem. For a bit more though, would you like us to flush the engine, check your tires, change your oil, check your lights, toot your horn etc.?” And I thought all that was included…How much is the etc.?
Here’s a classic example and one that I will never forget because I was the victim. I went to buy some speakers for my karaoke system, nothing expensive. A store in town had some for $100 that I was interested in, so off I went to pick them up. I was ready to buy them when a clerk came up to me. He asked what I wanted the speakers for and I told him. ”Before you buy, come with me for a sec.” I had time to burn so I followed him like the Pied Piper. He took me too a room and made me listen to a demo from some Nuance speakers. They were impressive! The price was more than a ‘bit more’, like $5000 more. I bought them and less than a year later, I bought the karaoke speakers that I really needed. Totally fleeced!
How about that car dealer? I have had more than my share of them. I would see a car that I was interested in, only to be told that it was a lemon, it needed brakes, it wouldn’t work for me. The Salesman seemed to always know what was right for me. ”Don’t worry, we have just the car for you. I know what you will look good in.” Maybe another dealer? In their best I-am-your-body voice, they would say stuff like, “This one costs $14000 but between us, I could swing it for $13000. Just between us, the boss doesn’t have to know.” Really! I am so excited! You are willing to screw your boss over for me even though we just met? Is it my tight ass and ruggedly handsome looks?
(The scantily clad female bartenders work the same way. Why do you think your man always come home drunk? And he’s not even a drinker).
This holiday season, look out for those upsellers. Don’t fall for the ‘Lost Leaders’. These are the products they mark down ridiculously to get you into the store, then when you arrive, they try their shtick on you. Usually, these items are already gone because supply was limited but don’t worry, they can sell you something that’s the same but better, and cost ‘a bit more.’
Remember when we were not allowed to shop to shop on Sundays? Well it’s not that we were not allowed, we couldn’t even if we wanted to. Why? Because the storekeepers were also not allowed to open up their stores. It wasn’t a problem as there are seven days in a week and if I needed an extra one to shop then I needed something more than just the ability to shop on Sundays. I would need an intervention of sorts.
Remember how the law makers tweaked the rule and allowed stores to open but not before 12pm and no later than 6pm? Some people were excited about this, others weren’t. The ‘others’ were those who had to work on a Sunday thus sacrificing their family.
Fast forward to present. Present as in today. Today the newspapers scream, ‘MORE TIME TO SHOP ON SUNDAYS – Province plans to ease limits on Sunday shopping‘ Ease limits on Sunday shopping? Wasn’t that what they did when they allowed stores to break with tradition and open at noon?
The fabric that holds families together is getting stretched and worn out by man’s greed. Corporations dictate when and how much time we could spend with our families. How about the employees who saw their Sundays off turned into half day offs and now full day Sundays? Is the sacrifice worth it? I don’t think so.
If you an avid shopper who would prefer using your extra time to interact with a Sales Person rather than a family member, I am sorry but you need to reconsider your priorities. But that’s just my take.
A couple of weeks ago, I had the pleasure of meeting my cousin's Science and English teachers at his school's 'Meet the Teachers' Event. I was less than impressed with the meeting. First, I went to see the English teacher. She looked at me as though I had interrupted her family supper and asked ME what would I like to know.
Yes please
Let’s get to the meat of this, pardon the pun. I love food. Gimme! Gimme! Burgers, Pizzas, especially pizzas, Thai, Chinese, (We are still talking about food), Caribbean, (oh I love me Island foods), whatever the food, I love it. In fact, I am hungry now just writing about food. It really is a good thing that I am blessed with good genes or I would be obese. As luck or genes would have it, I think I actually lose weight the more I eat. Sorry!
With age and a young family of three healthy boys, it became top priority that I pay more attention to my lifestyle and make necessary changes. I want to play with my kids, not watch them play from the confines of my bed or couch. I also realize that I do not have to be obese to be unhealthy.
So what am I doing about this? About two years ago, I discovered the magic of hot water with lemon. Read my blog about that here. With this elixir, I went from 195lbs to 180lbs within a few months. (I am 6″1′). I also recently joined a weight loss or weight management as I prefer to call it, program. My work sponsors it for all employees and their spouses. It is called The Enforcer Ecoaching and is a venture put on by Cleveland Clinic. Participants receive pedometers to track their daily steps and report to a health coach. The minimum steps required a day for a healthy lifestyle is 10,000. This sounds easy until you check your pedometer at the end of the day and find out you have only put in 2000 steps. You never want to email those figures to Dr. Mike as he would admonish you for not trying. This means running around my bed trying to add some much-needed steps to the meter. Working a desk job is no excuse.
Dr. Michael Roizen who is famous in the field of healthy living and the co-writer of a series of books with Dr. Oz called ‘YOU’, is the Ecoach. He is also the wellness guru at Cleveland Clinic. Him and his team reply to all my queries and give me regular pats on the back and recommendations. I once sent in my steps and they were around 6000. (slow day), Dr. Mike was not impressed. He urged me to get them back up to acceptable levels and recommended that I not try for close parking when I go shopping. I took that one to heart. All participants of The Enforcer program were also given a free ‘YOU’ book, ‘You On A Diet’. I am also required to send in my daily foods but I said nay to that. Trust me Dr. you really don’t want to know.
For exercise, I have been doing the one hundred pushup challenge for almost a year now. I came across it online and shared it with a few of my friends. Great program! I more than tripled my pushup reps in a matter of a few months.
Now when it comes to all those weight loss programs out there, Weight Watchers for me, carries the most weight. Pardon another pun. The thing is, with The Enforcer, I don’t have the luxury of eating whatever I want. I am destined to life without the fun foods. No more Burger King and Pizza hut and what kind of life would that be? Weight Watchers on the other hand promotes a diet based on enjoying your foods BUT eating it in moderation and tracking your calories intake. Now that’s more realistic and that I could live with.
My take? More cake
Last week Friday a friend and I pulled into a restaurant’s parking lot. The car in the spot in front of us was parked haphazardly. It was straddling the lines at the side and at the back. Seemingly, the driver had some problems navigating the space.
While we were getting out, the driver exited the car. It was an elderly woman. she was almost doubled over in half and my friend and I exchanged glances. We both were having the same thoughts. ”She should not be driving!” It wasn’t her age or her physical setbacks. We made a call based on what we saw.
On our lunch, we both conversed on the reasons why there should be a Graduated Licensing System. There are elderly men and women who are great drivers but on the flipside, there are many who are suffering from age-related deterioration in their abilities to operate a vehicle. Their pride makes them cling to this last vestige of their independence. An elderly woman that my mom once worked with admitted that her ability to drive was so diminished that she would usually follow the car ahead of her. Thankfully, she gave up her license before something terrible took place.
With Graduated Licensing, seniors who pose a threat to other motorists and themselves would be weeded out from those who are still able to drive and recognize traffic rules. This would also remove this unenviable task from the family. Have you Tried taking a senior’s Driver’s License?
So I greeted news of the proposal of such a system in Canada with eager anticipation. Read story here. Any system that could reduce injuries and lost of lives is ok with me.
