Maybe Your Kid’s Not Ready For Soccer

Soccer season is in full swing.  This is the time when parents run around ferrying the precious little ones all over the city trying to find which field they play on.  It could be very stressful, especially if you are a parent with more than one kid playing soccer.  In my case, I have 3 and each of them.  On different teams.

Last week it was my turn to take my 3-year old to his second game of the season.  My wife told me that he was doing really good and even scored a goal so I couldn’t wait to see him in action.  Unfortunately he seemed more attentive to daddy on the sidelines than he was on the ball.  He took regular timeouts to wave at me, inspect the grass and even running off the field prematurely to tell me a story.  I kept urging him back to the field of play.  When the ball happened to roll his way, he at least ventured to kick it.  Not so with some of the other kids.

Soccer is a great and cheap tool for young kids to learn team sports and social skills.  I am not sure it is effective if the kids spend the hour standing around inspecting the grass,  crying to get off the field or just showing a total indifference to the game.  Granted, a few kids do change as the season progresses but in most cases they don’t.  I for one would not think it is money well spent to watch my kid wander around a soccer field.  For free, I could take the little one to a park and kick a ball around.  If he doesn’t like it, we could come home and call it a day.  Sometimes as many as three parents are on the field urging their little ones on. Holding their hands and guiding them to the ball like a seeing-eye dog.  At my last game, there was a mom with a baby attached to her in one of those baby knapsack things running around the field with her soccer-playing son who was the least bit interested in being there.

Maybe I expect too much.  Maybe I’m one of those parents you read about.  (No, I’m not!).  I just think that there are cheaper ways to get your little ones to get out, play and socialize with other kids.  But maybe it’s actually for the parents to socialize with other parents…Maybe the parents need the exercise more than the little ones do.  Some parents have taken the hint from their kids and stopped taking them to soccer.  “I am not sure he likes it so we don’t bother taking him anymore.  Plus, I don’t enjoy chasing him around on the field.”   By their actions, the kids have spoken.  Maybe they are just not ready for soccer.  At least that’s what I think.

• That Soccer Season (caramieandtheboyz.wordpress.com)
• Moms vs Dads

Moms vs Dads

Happy Mother’s day to all the mothers.  If I had my way, you would have had a week set aside for us to pay homage to the women who cared unselfishly for us.

Moms are so awesome, aren’t they?  Without them, the world would be filled with wannabe macho men trying to live up to their dads’ expectations.  Ever been to a youth soccer game and listen to the parents of a kid?  The dad would shout in his gruff man voice, “Come on boy! Kick that ball like I showed you in practice!  You could do it!”  Mommy’s little voice would chime in, “Go baby, you are doing great!  Nice work.”

A dad gets home from work to find his 4-year old has made him a card with drawings that he toiled on for hours.  “Daddy look what I made for you!”  He shouts excitedly.  Dad glances at the thing and thought in his mind, What the heck is this? but says, “Good work son,  show it to your mom when she gets home.”   Sure enough mommy is quick to gush over her kid’s handiwork.  “Awww…that’s so sweet.  Look at it!”  And that’s why we love em.

Moms recognize their roles and accept it.  That’s why when a kid is acting up they would say,  “Just you wait until your Dad gets home!”  Dads recognize their roles also and play it well.  If the child does something nice, Dad would say, “Just wait until your Mom gets home and show it to her.”  Because Daddy doesn’t really care about such things that much.  He would add in his mind.

So that’s why we love our mothers.  They keep us in touch with our feminine sides and let us know that it is ok for grown men to cry.  Even if Daddy is watching.  We love you Mommy!  Have a Happy Mother’s Day!

Forgive Me Father For I Have Sinned

As a kid growing up in the Catholic church, I had to take my First Communion and also Confirmation.  Us kids were excited to make our First Communion as it meant we could ‘partake’ in holy communion.  To most of us, we were just happy to do what that adults did.  Plus it involved eating that ‘bread’ and drinking that ‘wine’.   Bread and wine sounded not too bad.  But before we could be awarded with such a prize, we had to first go to confession.

Confession meant kneeling at the side of a small room inhabited by the father. (preacher).  We would tell him what we did wrong (sins) and he would forgive us on behalf of God.  Well the problem was, we barely knew right from wrong and had to go to pre-confession classes so the nuns could tell us what to say.  Beep!  Shouldn’t confession be a bit more private and personal than that?  A few of my friends confessed to stealing bread from the dinner table.  I confessed to lying even though I didn’t know of any recent lies I had told.  I also confessed that I had stolen dried milk and sugar from my parents.  Something kids enjoyed from time to time.  To me and my friends, confession was a joke.  We confessed what they wanted us to confess.  We were not penitent.  We were too young to understand what it really meant.  Which brings me to the reason for this post.

A friend of mine has a young daughter who is about to make her first communion.  Or is it confirmation?  They are basically the same to me.  Anyways, she told me that she’s attending confession and knowing her tender age,  (She’s not much older than my 6-year old)  I immediately remembered my first experience.  I am sure her daughter does not fully grasp the concept of confessing her sins.  Her kiddie sins.   Can you imagine that little girl going home after confession and changing her ways? Staying in her room reading her bible?  I can’t.  I didn’t.

So do you really think kids should go to confession?  Ignore the fact that confessions should be solely between a person and their God.  Remember that after God died on the cross, the way was opened for us to communicate directly with him and through and intermediary but we won’t go into that right now.  Should kids go to confession?  I think not, but then again

It’s just my take.

 

 

 

Related articles

• I went to confession. (sarahberardi.com)

 

Here Comes Honey Boo Boo

No one bothered to tell me about this show before? I had to find in while surfing the web.  No one also bothered to think that this was a bit odd and wrong?  A 7-year old  parading around dressed inappropriately?  And we wonder about our lost morality and values…  And we wonder why there are so many young girls in Hollywood messed up to the hilts.   We promote it with garbage like this.

So I found out that Here Comes Honey Boo Boo is a show on TLC featuring toddler, Alana Thompson and her family.   Apparently, the family gained famed after being on Kids & Tiaras, another exploitation show.  (Oops, did I say exploitation? I meant beauty show).  In its first season, it was one of TLC’s most watched shows.  So there’s definitely an audience out there for that sort of thing.  We both know what they are called, it’s illegal in some states.

In case you didn’t know, HBB’s mom give her Go Go Juice so she could be alert for her engagements.  Don’t be alarmed, it’s only a mixture of red bull and mountain dew, the equivalent of two cups of coffee.  Nothing a precocious 7-year old can’t handle.

Now I don’t know about you, but this makes me furious.  I know it’s not my kid but seriously?  Have you seen pics of this girl and her family?  Worst yet, have you seen pics of this girl?  Suggestively posing in skin-revealing clothing that some, even you, might find cute but I don’t and I can’t.  How far is this exploitation of children going to go?  I know we are in an economic downturn and people are doing anything for money to take care of themselves and their families.  Fame and fortune at any cost is the order of the day.  But please, not the children.  Let them be children.

You know you should quit when your kid tells you they hate being in the spotlight and hate it when fans approach them.   End it now before it becomes  ”There Goes Honey Boo Boo”

 

Hey, if this sort of thing turns your crank and you are a fan of this show, don’t let me rain on your parade, knock yourself out as they say cuz it’s just MY TAKE.

Related articles

• Kris Jenner Wants To Manage Honey Boo Boo – Report (hollywoodlife.com)
• Honey Boo Boo’s Niece Kaitlyn Already Competing In Pageants (hollywoodlife.com)
• Honey Boo Boo Doesn’t Like Being On TV, Hates Fans Encounters (VIDEO) (huffingtonpost.com)
• Is Honey Boo Boo Headed Towards A Meltdown? (997now.cbslocal.com)
• http://herecomeshoneybooboo.wikia.com/wiki/Alana_Thompson

Texteritis outbreak reported!

Students with Texteritis. Note the hunched shoulders

Don’t panic just yet but I have some bad news.  Apparently there is an epidemic, or is it pandemic? that is going around.  Yes sir, it’s called Texteritis that is very contagious.  It does not discriminate.  Sex, age or race, no one is exempted.  Don’t take this lightly folks, this is some serious stuff I’m talking about right here.  I don’t care who you are, this stuff aint funny.

Take the other day for example, my wife and I were at a restaurant enjoying a rare lunch moment alone.  No, not alone with the kids, alone with each other.  There’s no such thing as ‘enjoying lunch with kids’ and you should know that, if not go read here.  But anyways, as I was saying, we were having lunch at a restaurant and happened to see these five young construction workers suffering from various forms of Texteritis.  Texteritis usually renders its victim speechless and devoid of social skills, hence they were sitting there without a word to each other.  Their hunched shoulders, were also a symptom of Texteritis.  How sad.

Now, I am not immune to this disease.  I have experienced minor symptoms myself which compels me to grab my cell while in the company of friends and family, and start texting.   With exercise and self-discipline, I have been able to avert a full onset of the disease, fortunately.  Some are not so fortunate.

In the same restaurant,  not far from the stricken construction workers, four businessmen sat with zombie-like expressions,  (a visible sign of Texteritis).  They, like the construction workers, had also lost the ability to converse.  Again, how sad.

If you are still thinking that this is a teenager disease, think again.  On the weekend I was at the beach and not far from my picnic spot sat an elderly gentleman and his happy-face wife.  I am not sure why she was even happy as her husband was obviously suffering late stage Texteritis.  He was sitting there, albeit close to her, while his thumbs flew across the keypad.  Ok, maybe he was just playing games on it but he too seemed to have lost verbal communication. When I left the beach, he was still sitting there with his oblivious happy wife.  Well, as the saying goes, as long as they are happy…

The crazy thing about Texteritis is that it can strike at anytime and anyplace, just asked the young woman who was took ill on her own wedding day while walking down the aisle with her dad no less! Yes, you read it right, she had to send and or receive a text message at that important time.  If you are going, ‘What?!’  Read it here.  This Texteritis is nothing to sneeze at.  poor bride.  How sad.

I have seen victims of the disease at work desks, bus stops, churches, toilet stalls, everywhere.

I am a worry wart or a hypochondriac as the medical people call it, so I of course went to see my doctor with my concerns.  He assured me that I had nothing to worry about and that Texteritis generally, note that I said ‘generally’ strikes those between 13 and 39.   He said with proper parenting, my own kids should be ok.  The good doctor also made some suggestions as to how I could immunize myself and my family from this dreaded disease.

I will share his recommendations with you.

Keep exercising your voice by using it to talk to my friends and family, not by texting.

When in a social setting, put cell on vibrate and put it away unless it’s an emergency.

It’s not that important that you have to text and drive or walk and text.

You should practice calling someone on you cell.  If  you can remember how to.

I quickly made it home to pass on this information to our ailing foster son.  His response was, “Maybe they have an app for that.”

Note:  If you or someone you know are experiencing uncontrollable urges to texts at inopportune times which alienates you from friends and family, please pay attention to your symptoms and seek help immediately, your social life depends on it!

Related articles

• NJ town bans texting and walking (mega949.com)
• Kids with Blackberries
• 1-2-3 Texting
• Bride caught texting at her own wedding

Living in a bubble

Do you want to know how much our kids are pampered and coddled these days?  Well never mind, I am sure you do know.  It’s clearly visible every single day.  As a daddy, I am scared of what they are going to be like when it’s their turn to run this world.

Just a few weeks ago, I was at a bbq and happened to notice that one of the kids had a weird contraption that looked like a hand-held fan.  On the table was a shallow container with soapy water.  It didn’t take my rusty brain long to figure out what it was.  It was a bubbles maker!  You dip the fan-like thing into the soapy water, turn it on and voila! you’ve got bubbles without wasting a breath.  Heck, one could still keep up with their texts while blowing bubbles now.  Are you kidding me?

Our kids are missing the point on life.  It’s not about the bubbles, it’s the effort it takes to let out just the right amount of air to give you that perfect bubble.  Can’t our kids get a chance to break a sweat over anything anymore?  The schools work around them and allow them to be tardy and underachieving.  For example, at a meeting with one of our foster son’s teachers, he was told by the teacher not to worry too much about the work that he did not hand in during the term as he could always drop them off after exams and get his mark changed.  Now what is that doing to us who are trying to instill in him, the value of getting his work done and handed in on time?  What is this kid learning here?  That the world waits on him and he could get away with anything?

In sports, our poor over-worked children are taught not to compete.  Don’t keep scores and leave the nets empty. (no goaltenders).  It’s all about the fun of the game.  Who cares about developing the kids early? Thank goodness Wayne Gretzky and Tiger Woods didn’t grow up in this.   Coincidentally, recent studies are showing that obesity is a growing concern among kids.  They are not active enough.  Duh.

Back in the islands, we made our own toy cars and trucks.  We blew bubbles using our breaths, even though I was asthmatic, I was right in there with the best of them.  We played sports and yelled and celebrated when we scored or won a game.  No kid was traumatized by losing.  We knew our limitations so it didn’t bother us  that we weren’t the best player.   We kept playing.  Our teachers marked us ‘fail’ or ‘pass’ and nothing we did after the fact could change that mark.  Now look at me now.  Ok, maybe I’m not exactly a good example so don’t look but yeah, you get my drift.

(Do you know that they now have an app that blows bubbles for you?).

Our kids today are pampered, spoiled, coddled and over-protected.  I fear that they are ill-prepared to deal with the real world that awaits them when the bubble bursts.  But what do I know? It’s just my take.

Related articles

• Really Big Bubbles – I Mean Really Big! (francineclouden.typepad.com)
• Why innovation flourishes in a bubble (cbsnews.com)
• Our Schools

Kids bullying turns monitor into millionaire.

In case you were sleeping or doing whatever and missed it, a bus monitor was bullied by a group of middle school students and the video was posted on the internet.  Watch here.  It was a sick and disgusting display of children gone wrong.  Totally unacceptable and should never happen anywhere and to anyone.   Many people were touched by the video and it prompted a fund to be set up to raise money to send the monitor, Karen Klien, on a well-deserved vacation.   So far, donations have reached over $650,000.

Well, what kind of  blogger would I be if I do not put in my two cents worth?  What do I think of the matter?   I  commented sometime last week that Karen was obviously in the wrong line of work.  Correct me if I’m wrong but isn’t it the bus monitor’s duty to crack down on this kind of behavior on the bus?  What if they were bullying another kid instead? What would have been her reaction?  Apparently, she told the news that she has a hearing problem and didn’t hear much of the taunts.  Thank goodness and bless  her heart.  She didn’t need to hear some or any of those taunts anyways.  But if she couldn’t hear most of the insults, would she have heard them if they were directed at another kid on the bus?  See where I’m coming from?

Now about the money.  Money soothes everything, right?  Wrong.  The problem is still not addressed.  Yes, she might have a nice vacation somewhere but how about the bullies?  Would they find another victim to prey upon? Is this it? Sending money to a victim of bullying does not send a lesson to the perpetrators.  It does nothing to ease the pain of the other faceless victims around the world.  So I am not really sure that giving almost a million dollars to Karen Klein was the right thing to do.  I realize it was probably a knee jerk reaction to a video showing a sweet woman being bullied.  I do agree with sending her a plane ticket to a destination of her choice.   As I stated earlier, in my view, it is the job of a bus monitor to address any unacceptable behavior on a school bus.  If a group of school kids were to bully a police officer, would you be inclined to send financial aid?  If not, why not? Because they are paid to deal with this sort of thing, right? Bullying is bullying though, no matter the age or sex or job description of the victim.

I know this take would not be too popular but I would not be sincere and fair to myself if I pretended that I felt the opposite.  Saying this, as a parent of kids that I love dearly and also having an autistic brother,  I am against any and all acts of bullying whether against children or adults who are incapable of defending themselves.  We as a society, should do as much as we can to fight this plague.

Instead of giving Karen Klein $650,000, wouldn’t it make more sense to donate it to Anti-Bullying Programs? Awareness? Bus Monitor Training?   Bullies Rehab? Now that’s what I’m talking about.

Karen Klein, God bless you and I am sorry you had to go through that.

Just my take.

Related articles

• Don’t Take That Money, Bullied Bus Lady (gawker.com)
• Carrie Goldman: Bullying on the Bus: Solutions and Analysis (huffingtonpost.com)
• Should Bullied Bus Monitor Keep All Her “Vacation” Money? Man Behind The Donation Campaign Weighs In! (AUDIO) (radio.foxnews.com)
• http://ca.news.yahoo.com/blogs/daily-buzz/karen-klein-fund-raises-nearly-650-000-where-202028566.html

Son, don’t listen to your daddy

Kenyan, my 3-year old son, takes his soccer games seriously, as he does any sport he chose to play.  While his easily distracted teammates wander around the field, Kenyan stays focused on the game.  Even when he’s sitting out he still chose to sit and watch his team play and cheers them on.  Not coincidentally, he is one of the better player on the team and scores an average of 6 goals a game.  This blog however, is not about his soccer exploits.

After clapping his first couple goals, I usually keep a low profile and encourage him to involve his team by passing the ball.  Most of the kids play a one-on-five game and plays against their team so this is hard to instill at that age.   Fortunately, he seems to get the idea and I high-five him for making passes as much as scoring goals.

Yesterday he started his shift by netting two quick strikes.  After the third goal he actually started passing off to his teammates, even giving up scoring opportunities.  He did not score another goal for the rest of the game.  Unfortunately, I don’t think his team did either.

Just before he got on the field for the last shift of the game,  I experienced a sudden bout of  selfishness and without thinking, said to Kenyan, ‘This is your last shift, go out there and score a few goals, don’t bother to pass the ball, just go!’  Yes, I did say that.  I don’t know what came over me and as soon as I said it, I felt disappointed in myself.  Thank goodness I have instilled values in my son and he had retained them.  Kenyan turned, looked at me in dismay as though he couldn’t believe I actually said that.  ”Daddy, they are on my team, I have to pass to them.”

Yes, that’s all it took.  A nice gentle rebuke from my 3-year old to nudge me in sensibility.  Yes son, you are right.  Don’t listen to what daddy just said, go out there and play with your team.

Isn’t it awesome when your kid uses the life lesson you taught him to bring you back on track?  Even as parents, we are not above rebuke.

Note:  Now don’t go all ‘awww’ as this is the same kid who just yesterday, yelled ‘Mikhail, you suck!’  at his brother’s soccer game after Mikhail missed the ball on an easy goal attempt.

Related articles

• Kids’ Soccer Season (caramieandtheboyz.wordpress.com)
• Lindell is ‘that kid’ yelling on the sidelines (bangordailynews.com)

Six Year Old Handcuffed By Police For Throwing Tantrum

I am not sure how I feel about this.  As a Dad with a 5-year-old son, I can’t imagine him being put in handcuffs and thrown in a cell.  I would be devastated!  He’s a kid!

This 6-year-old girl apparently flew in a rage and started destroying her kindergarten classroom (shouldn’t she be in grade school by 6?).  She was ripping stuff off the wall and knocking a shelf over.  (I am not sure what serious damage my 6-year-old would be able to inflict at that age.  Not much).  The cops were called and responded by handcuffing her and hauling her off to jail. (holding cell).

Questions on parenting would surely be raised and so too would questions on the use of restraints by the police.  My take is, there should be a system in place that when there is an issue at an elementary school and the police are called, a social worker or someone qualified to deal with ‘problem kids’ should also be summoned.  Heck, a negotiator can talk a man with a gun into surrendering, imagine what they could do to an unarmed 6-year-old…

Read the article and feel free  to add your take.

http://news.yahoo.com/police-handcuff-ga-kindergartner-tantrum-112459850.html

Related articles

• Kindergarten cops: Police HANDCUFF six-year-old girl after she ‘threw a tantrum at school’ (mirror.co.uk)
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• Salecia Johnson: 6-year-old handcuffed after ‘tantrum’ in kindergarten class (thegrio.com)
• Georgia kindergartener handcuffed during tantrum (csmonitor.com)
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My Take On The No-Kids Movement

It seems that as much as we take a step forward as a society, we take two backwards.  We keep this up and pretty soon we would be back in the dark ages.

Did you know that there is a  No-Kids Allowed Movement out there? Until recently, I didn’t either.  I just found out that it has been around for some time now and is growing in leaps and bounds.  The movement even boasts its own Facebook page.  Does this remind you of anything? Think racism.  Think of the signs that used to read ‘Whites only, no blacks allowed’.  (Sorry, I normally hesitate on using my color as example but in this case it helps to underscore my point).

Some  restaurants, theaters, hotels and even grocery stores are already banning kids from their establishments.  Yep. Just when you thought we were over this BS.

I am a dad of three little boys so I can’t fathom this nonsense.  This is not only a strike against my kids but also against me.  If you cannot accept my kids then you cannot accept me.  We are a packaged deal.  If I can’t take my kids with me, would you babysit them? I didn’t think so.

I understand the argument that kids can sometimes be nuisances especially when  in public places like stores, restaurant, church etc.  but isn’t this going too far?   Should we keep them away from school too as they are a bother to teachers? How about church? I am usually interrupted by a crying kid while in the sanctuary.  Is this an excellent reason to put up the ‘No Kids’ sign?  You have to agree with me that is it a bit much.

Having kids is a choice that not everyone makes.  Some who does make that choice  should have opted not to.  In some cases, they are the ones who make it bad for us parents with good intentions and parenting skills.  Those who exercise their rights not to bear children sometimes try to impose their choices on others.  This No-Kids nonsense is one such imposition.

Children learn from their environment and keeping them away from establishments does not serve any purpose.  They are too loud on planes, too unruly at the grocery stores and movie theaters, well have you seen some adults lately? Maybe even yourself?  Some of us are not exactly model citizens and are worst than some kids.

Kids are not second-hand smoke, we can’t go around putting up ‘No-Kids’ signs.  What do you think that would do kids? What would it do to you if suddenly you were banned from places because of your sexual orientation? How about autistic adults who operates at the intelligence level of a child? Ban them too?

Let’s see, instead of putting all this on the kids and letting them pay such harsh penalty, how about we put the blame where it belongs? On bad parenting. Parents who let their kids roam unchecked.  Parents who breed kids like a kitty mill just so they can take advantage of the system. Parents who are kids themselves.  Why not go at them more aggressively?  Make them more responsible.  If they are on social assistance, discourage them from having kids.  Enlighten them.  Let them attend parenting workshops as part of their requirements for getting assistance.   These are just some ideas but there are more.  Do what you must but leave our children alone.

Related articles

• http://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/the-no-kids-allowed-movement-is-spreading-2516110.html
• http://michaeldouglasjohnson.com/2011/07/28/the-no-kids-allowed-movement-is-spreading/
• http://suburbanturmoil.com/the-no-kids-allowed-movement-is-spreading-and-im-glad/2011/07/27/