Who Needs That Crap?
What a society we have become. Our ancestors would be embarrassed to see us now. Reality television, Celebrity addiction, paying big dollars for crap…yes crap and I mean the one that belongs in the toilet not on your trophy wall.
Yesterday, the first story I read was one in which a used pair of underpants once worn by Elvis Presley was going on sale. The final price was expected to be in the tens of thousands. I could not stop thinking how ridiculous and disgusting this was. Not to mention the waste of money.
To further illustrate how far our race has fallen, the seller was brave and confident enough to actually described the undies to be ‘unwashed’ and ‘stained’. In the stores, you are not even allowed to try on underwear but here we are, so enthralled by celebrities, that we are willing to pay top dollars for an old poop-stained one. Now what would anyone do with a used undies? And also, what makes Elvis’ poop more important than yours or mine? This underscores the saying, ‘His sh** doesn’t stink?.
Seriously though, what exactly would the buyer do with this trophy? Or maybe I don’t want to know? How does it authenticate it? Is it really the King’s poop? Would he wash it and wear it? Or wear it as is? Or smell it? Help me here because I must be missing something.
Yes, we are one strange species. I think it’s time I holler for Scotty to beam me up. Lots of life form down here but no intelligence. To those who were before us, I am sorry. Glad you are not around to see us like this.
- Elvis’ Underwear Goes Up for Auction (rollingstone.com)
- [Watercooler Moment] Elvis Presley’s underwear to auction for £10,000 (newstalk.ie)
- There Is No Way In Hell Anyone Is Outbidding Me For Elvis’ Piss-Stained Undies (rhodyview.com)
- Let’s be brief: Elvis’ underwear up for auction (sfluxe.com)