Frank but Funny Friday: Are You Dressing Inappropriately?

I am going to Disney Land!

I just found this draft I made over 4 years ago and decided to post it.

A few weeks ago, while walking to my car downtown, I happened to be walking behind a couple of ‘well-dressed’ women out for a night of partying.  As they walked, their hands were busy trying to keep their much-too-short dresses, that looked more like a shirt, from giving passer-bys an unplanned sneak peek.  Fortunately for them, they were successful.  Unfortunately for them, their luck didn’t hold when it came to their shoes.

These women were wearing stilt-like heels.  All of a sudden, one of them had an ankle that decided it wanted to get closer to the ground.  The young woman wanted none of that and fought to resist this upstarted ankle.  She overcorrected and next thing you know, she is fighting with both ankles, stumbling like a drunken sailor, this way and that until she finally got within arm’s reach of a railing.  Not to be left out, her friend’s ankles decided to do the same thing and she too ended up sharing the railing with her friend. A smile creased my face as I walked past them, fighting the urge to laugh out loud.

That was the consequence of dressing inappropriately.  These women were dressed to look good, at the expense of their comfort and consequently, their embarrassment.  It was quite obvious that they had no clue what dressing inappropriately was, so I have compiled a list for them and anyone of you who might need it also.

If you spend your fun night out pulling the hem of your skirt or dress down, you are dressed inappropriately. Go change.

If you walk around as though you are about to fall on your face because you just had to buy those 6″ high heels, you are dressed inappropriately.

Those 80’s high waisted shorts are back in!  The ones that go way up past your belly button.  Well if your belly button is getting more coverage than your butt cheeks, then maybe you are also dressed inappropriately? You think?

Talking about shorts, if the underside of your butt winks at me as you walk by, what do think?

If there’s no beach in sight for miles, yet you are dressed in a nice sexy 2-piece bathing suit and walking around the town, then yup, you look good, but inappropriate.  Kinda like that racist joke you heard at work, sounded good but so inappropriate.  A friend of mine on a recent trip to Disney, asked the question on Facebook if it was right for young, I mean really young, girls to walk around the beach in Disneyland wearing thongs. You tell me.

If there’s a beach close by but you saw it fit to wander off in your new thongs and mingle with families just out for a stroll, then maybe you are dressed inappropriately.

Last winter, I saw a lot of young women wearing house slippers outside, even with snow on the ground.  That has to be a mental thing but it’s still inappropriate!  I don’t care if it’s warm and comfy!

You are not in bed but at the mall yet you are clad in your cotton flannel pajama pants.  (And house slippers!) Definitely inappropriate. Go back to bed!

If your OUTERwear is getting more air time than your UNDERwear, you just might be dressed inappropriately.

If none of the above applies to you but your 12-year old daughter is guilty, then tell her nicely she’s dressing inappropriately.

Talking about daughter, if you and your daughter fight over who gets to wear what, then let her have it, it’s inappropriate for you anyways.

There’s a time and a place for everything, even your inappropriate attire, it’s in October and it’s called Halloween.

But again, it’s my take and maybe I’m just out of touch with the times…

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