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It’s A Boy! It’s A Girl! It’s…It’s…What Is It?

Related imageThere’s a saying, ‘If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck and quack likes a duck, then it’s probably is a duck.’  I live by that mantra, kinda.  So when I saw the yahoo news about a baby born in British Columbia that was not assigned a sex at the parents’ wishes,  I thought, “How could that be?”  I showed the story to my 10-year old and he asked, “Can’t they tell if it has a pee pee or not?” (Hmm…maybe he read the book above). My response was, “Maybe there’s nothing there.”  You see, I was a bit naive, I wasn’t thinking inside the box.  Read story here.

You can’t blame me for being naive when all my life and my parents’ lives and my parents’ parents’ lives, there have always been a male and a female.  Pardon my ignorant simplicity, blame it on my upbringing.  I am really not used to this grey undetermined area.  In my simple mindedness, I thought that  It wasn’t up to parents to choose what gender they wanted their kid to be, or raise them as fence-straddlers until they decided their sexual orientation.  Reminds you of The Bachelor, doesn’t it?

Why oh why do we let this madness happen?  Why do we cave in to every inane whim by a faction of our society with too much time on their hands?  Dismantling everything once held sacred, now this.  A parent can now choose whether or not their kid, who was born with male parts, lives like a boy, a girl or sex unassigned.  SEX UNASSIGNED? No, no, it was assigned but you just don’t want to accept it.  It’s like accepting your parking spot that your work assigned to you because you thought that it was too far of a walk to the front door.  I pity the kid…

The parents of the above organism, wants it to grow up and gravitate to its own natural sexual orientation.  Like choosing if it wants to pee standing up or sitting down, briefs or G-strings, be a wife or a husband, join a girls’ sports league or a boys’ etc after first experimenting with them.  They also do not want the poor kid to be labelled.   Newsflash! It’s not labelling.  If it looks like a…nevermind, the world is so messed up that one little unassigned-sex kid won’t even cause a ripple.


Just my take…


Who Are You?

Do I know you? Do you know you? That may be the better question.  Everyone wants everyone to be like…yes, everyone but themselves. Why can’t you be like so-and-so? As a young kid, my aunt wanted me to be like The Baileys.  The Baileys were our upper-class family friends, quite naturally, their kids were classy and well-mannered.  At least in the public eye.  My aunt didn’t know they farted without saying excuse me.

There is so much conversation on young people being forced or pressured to look and act a certain way.  As parents we resent and discuss this with disgust but in many ways we are guilty of setting the trend.  How many of us ask our halves to be different?  “Honey, why can’t you be like this?  Do it for me.  Wear this…”  I have seen it in friends who were once wild and free with independent minds, becoming zombie-like as they lose their own identity and take on that of their other halves.  They just melded.

Sometimes a change is good.  Your wife finally gets you to loosen up and try something you have never tried before, you did and found out you loved it!  In fact, you are a natural at it!  This does not change who you are.  It just means you have added something new to what makes you.  Kudos to the wifey!  Life is a life-long learning experience.  You sometimes learn that you are not one-dimensional after all!  I for one have found out I like chips after all! Thanks honey!

On the flipside, I have seen my once-funny friends get involved with Debbie Downers and turned into Boring Bobs.  (Isn’t it funny that it rarely works the other way?).  A happy you is the real you are and being anything other than that is compromising or rejecting the very things that characterize who are you.

Don’t be like the Baileys or anyone else for that matter.  Be YOU, but first, find out who you really are.





Lessons my dog taught me

It’s been about over a year now since we got Reilly, our Lab cross.  She is all grown now but technically still a pup.  I would be telling a lie if I said that I have no regrets about getting a dog. I was never really a dog lover. I tolerated them and give them just the right attention, but they were like grandchildren to grandparents, give them attention and treats then send them home to their parents.  For some strange reason, the wife and I decided that having a dog would be great for the kids.  Plus they promised they would do all the dog duties.

I envisioned getting a dog like my friends’.  One that sits and cuddles and walks around the house without wanting to eat everything, including the house.  A dog that I could take walking or jogging and he would not trip me.  I could even ride my bike while he trots alongside.  I am not dreaming, I have seen such dogs! And that’s the dog I wanted.  What I got was Reilly.  The total opposite.

Reilly is as cute as any dog could be. She just wants to play, my wife always says when I am mad at her for not complying, even after being told over and over and over again. Yes, I have done the treats thing, some obedience classes and whatever you were going to prescribed. She’s still just a puppy, everyone says that too.

A puppy is like a little baby.  Always exploring and getting into things, so it was no reason for me to flip my lid over poor Reilly’s inability to comprehend that Daddy gets mad when she goes upstairs or sits on the couch or grab edible and non-edible items off the tables. She’s just a baby or a puppy. The thing is though, I wasn’t ready for another baby. With 3 little boys, I had my hands full. What was I thinking?  Or was I even thinking?

Having Reilly has taught me a few things.  As hard as rabid dog lovers/owners try to push dogs on everyone, they are NOT for everyone. Just like kids aren’t for everyone.  It’s totally ok, you or anyone else do not HAVE TO love dogs. No, just like you don’t HAVE TO love or want kids.  Just don’t abuse them is all you need to do. Many of my friends are anti-kids.  Doesn’t mean that I won’t trust my kids with them.

Dogs, like kids, can also grow on you.  They could be therapeutic as they are very forgiving and trusting. One of my most disgusting pet peeves was seeing dog hair on people’s clothing.  Eew! I couldn’t have a dog in our house that leaves its hair all over the place, no way! Now I barely notice the strands of Reilly’s hair that decorate my clothes as I leave for work. Or even the odd stray hidden in my food.  I probably have a small fur-ball growing in my stomach by now anyways.

Yes, dogs and kids can teach us some lessons.  If we could only stick around long enough.


A Thought

Think on this:

If today is the best day of your life, it won’t last. Tonight might be an inch short of hopeless; it won’t last either. Whatever has brought you to this moment is only part of the story of your life and relationship. The rest is yet to come. Put all of it—dark thorns and shining threads—into God’s hands, and he will sustain you.

The Eyes See What The Heart Wants To See

I really need to work on being a bit more observant especially to things happening around me as apparently I miss quite a lot! Take Superbowl 50 for example, I miss important stuff! World changing stuff! People being racist stuff!

Ok, what are you ranting about now, Carlos? Glad you asked, and if you must know, I just found out that while I was being entertained by the half-time show featuring Coldplay, Beyonce and Bruno Mars, I was also unknowingly watching a public display of racism put on by Bey.  Yup.  In a nutshell.

I wasn’t exactly a willing participant, mind you.  In fact, until the day after, I had no clue that her performance was laden with racial implications advertising her support for the Black Panther movement and Malcolm X.  Man, do I ever feel foolish! I had to find out on social media! To be honest, I also missed the guy dancing behind Mark Ronson! The thing went viral!

I enjoyed the half-time show. I saw a darn good performance by a black woman. Not that I cared if she was black or white. I wanted to see her perform so when she did, I was totally into the performance. I missed the racist allusions and in fact, didn’t even notice that she along with her dancers, were clad in bullet-proof vests! Oh my! I must be getting old. Not saying she didn’t, but I missed it!

You see, the eyes see what the eyes want to see.  Take the photo below for example.  It’s of an expired snowman in my neighbor’s yard.  If your heart is so inclined, you could see a phallic symbol. Maybe that would be reason to pay a visit to the neighbors and maybe accuse them of public mischief? Indecent exposure? If you go looking behind rocks, of course you would find all kind of nasty and dangerous things.


What does your heart want you to see?

I looked at the half-time show with my heart set on enjoying some good performances, not too look for connotations and hints.  And that’s why I missed it!

And that’s also, MY TAKE

God’s Gone High Tech!

When my Pastor walked up to the pulpit and opened up his Ipad to read the Bible passage, I was aghast!  This has got to be sacrilegious!  Blasphemous even!  That was about 15 years ago.  I was slow to embrace this new trend.  How could the Holy Bible be traded in for an electronic device? It’s just not the same. What would people think?  What would God himself think?

I reluctantly started using my cell phone in church to access the Bible about 2 years ago.  Before using it in church, I used the Bible Gateway app for my daily devotions.  In church, I was not comfortable and felt the urge to make sure everyone knew that I was not on my phone texting but perusing the Gospel. Hello! I am actually reading the book of John here, not texting my friend John.

Last week, a friend posed the question pertaining to the above on his Facebook status.  He had visited a church and was surprised to see the elders using their cell phones instead of Bibles.  He wanted to see how his friends felt about this. Many felt that cellphones or any other such electronic gadgets had no place in a church. Although I understood the sentiments, I had to disagree.

Having the ease to access the Bible using an app on my phone has actually enabled me to become better at navigating the Bible. It also encourages me to read more often by the suggestions of devotions, geared to every life issues.  I always have my cell phone but I do not always have my bible.

Like it or hate it, technology is here to stay.  A phone is not just a phone anymore,  it’s our computer, our planner, our journal, our Bible.  It’s our one-stop shop. In order to reach out to the masses, we need to be on their level.

The world’s a changing place.  To attract people to God, we need to adapt to the changes. Music has to have appeal without sacrificing the Message. The Bible has to appeal to young readers, churches need to feel like a happy fun place.  Whatever medium it takes to realize this, as long as God is not compromised, it’s all good.

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How do you dream big?

I recently got our 16 year-old International German student Hanna, to start a blog as she has such great insight for someone her age.  This is her second blog and for one who thinks she has a problem with the English language, it is very well written and sensible.  Worthy of a reblog.  Check her out at


At my host family’s house in the living room, there’s a big picture which says: “Family rules” on it. So a couple weeks ago little Treyton started to read this sign (since he learns how to read now in Grade 1) and besides the obvious rules like listen to your parents and always tell the truth this sign simply has the two words: “Dream Big” on it. And of course he asked his parents: “Mommy, daddy, how do you dream big?”Difficult question to explain a 6 year old when I’m as a 16 year old still have to think about it. A lot.

Dream big? Does it mean to dream something particular while you are sleeping or what do we have to do to dream big? No, not really. It’s not about what you are dreaming in the night, it’s what you are dreaming about in your head, in your…

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Racism Or Ignorance?

Today I read with disdain, the news that three effigies of blacks were found hanging by nooses at the Berkeley Campus of the University of California.  As we speak, tensions are high in the US with the past shootings of blacks by police under suspicious circumstances.  Stories like the above add fuel to an already smouldering fire that is threatening to turn into a firestorm.

Now is this just some idiot thinking it was funny to take advantage of what is happening in the USA? Or using it as a springboard to air his or her racist agenda? Or just some ignoramus thinking something like this is funny and could make it on the evening news?  Either way, it’s dumb, stupid, ignorant and totally unacceptable!

It’s painful to read and watch something like this.  We are trying to build bridges to create two-way traffic between races but as we build, there are some who insist on demolishing these bridges.  These cowardly creeps use the cover of night to sneak up and destroy the hard work of those who seek to make this world a place where all people regardless of color are treated equally.  Is it ignorance? Is it racism? Ignorance breeds racism, racism is the product of ignorance.  Ignorance creates fear, fear makes people do stupid things.

Unless the world sees a Global societal cleansing, the wheels on this vicious cycle will continue to turn…

Just My Take.


Gaza boys bombed after sneaking out to play on beach latest casualties in Israel, Hamas battle

Stop already!

My Take On Donald Sterling

thThe web is awash with criticisms for Donald Sterling over his alleged racist remarks caught on tape.  On the recordings, the voice alleged to be Sterling’s, who is also the owner of the NBA Los Angeles Clippers, was heard telling his girlfriend that he does not want black people at his games and other anti-black remarks.   The irony of it is that his obviously gold-digger girlfriend was part black and so too is 99.9% of the team he owns!

Everyone from President Obama to Michael Jordan has voiced their opinion on the matter.  The Clippers also showed their displeasure by turning their jerseys inside out during a playoff game, hiding the team logo.  I usually don’t let stuff like this bother me nor do I get surprised when someone displays such ignorance. I take it all in stride.  Why?  Because I have come to accept that the world is not a perfect place and people are not always what they seem.

Now at first sight, one might think that owning a team made up of mainly black athletes would mean that the owner has some form of race acceptance, especially of blacks, right?  In fact, you won’t be going too far to think that he might even be a cool guy like say…Rob Ford.  Unfortunately, this is not the case.  As my Grandmother would say, “Every shine teeth nah good laff,”  loosely translated to mean that not everyone smile is genuine. And Mr. Sterling proved just that.

As long as there are races, there would always be racism in just the same way that there would be murders as long as there are humans.  So as the young people would say, ‘Let the haters hate.’  Donald Sterling is ignorant.  Donald Sterling is a disgrace.  Donald Sterling is a setback to civilization.  Too bad there are many Donald Sterlings out there.  You can read about some of them here.

My Take.

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